Welcome to Money Diaries, where we're tackling what might be the last taboo facing modern working women: money. We're asking a cross-section of women how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period – and we're tracking every last penny.
This week we're with a full-time mum to two kids who are just about to turn three (A) and one (B). She used to be an Ad Sales Director in a global media company and went back to work full-time between having her first and second child. She has just resigned.
She says: “Given that my husband and I had the same salary this is a huge drop in our household income. We have also just renovated our home using our mortgage and combined savings and are hoping to sell out and undergo a hard ‘Lexit’ (departure from London to remote rural area) in the next 6-12 months. Living in an up-and-coming corner of south London, my immediate retail radius is, frankly, limited. With two frenetic offspring permanently in tow, in-store shopping opportunities must meet the following thrilling criteria: a) ACCESS: aisles large enough to accommodate the double buggy, b) AMBIENCE: enough background noise to mask my children’s screaming. As a result, 90% of my non-supermarket based purchases are made online.”
Industry: Unemployed
Age: 35
Location: London
Salary: £0 (My husband earns £90,000)
Monthly paycheque: £5,000
Number of housemates: 3 (1 husband and 2 kids)
Monthly Expenses:
Mortgage: £1,750
Loan payments: None but still owe our builder around £5-10k
Utilities: £200
Council tax: £170
Home insurance: £20
Contents insurance: £50
Running a car (insurance/tax/petrol): £200
Transportation: £70
Savings: £0 (it all went into the house renovation)
Entertainment: Netflix/Amazon/Wi-Fi: £36
Son’s nursery: (3 mornings a week) £498
Contact lenses: £45
Mobile phone: £38
Cleaner: £100 (comes every 2 weeks for 5 hours)
Charity donations: £45
Beauty Pie subscription: £10
Total: £3,332
Day One
1.30am: Wake to gut-wrenching screams from B, husband pretending to be dead. She necks bottle of milk and we both go back to sleep.
8am: Train to London Bridge to take B to St Thomas’ for a hip X-ray. Am overwhelmed by shiny retail opportunities, but lured into Pret by wide buggy-friendly entrance for a takeaway flat white and almond croissant. £3.70
10.30am: Bus home, sit next to a lady with similar-aged baby and she tells me her near-fatal (for her) birth story. Shocking but standard conversational mum fare.
12.30pm: Pick A up from nursery – he lies down on pavement outside glamorous strip of gambling outlets in random protest. Men drinking cans outside William Hill give me parenting advice. End up carrying A’s 18kg bulk and push B in buggy with other arm for 10-minute walk home. Consider it a saving on gym membership.
3pm: Fun new neighbouring mum comes round with her kids.
5pm: Excited by finding hilarious new friend and conduct running races with A round the house while Spotifying nursery rhymes. Crowd pleaser!
6pm: Bill comes through for deposit on shutters for our bay window. £500. Whack it on the credit card.
8pm: Discuss with husband how much it costs to put the tumble dryer on. Apparently around 40p per load. I am encouraged to hang clothes out. I work out that if I don’t use the tumble dryer 1,250 times, that will pay for our shutter deposit. Ridiculous.
Total: £503.70
Day Two
10am: Playgroup – £3 for the two kids. A throws an extravagant tantrum after mildly violent altercation over plastic hockey stick with a not-so-sensitive child. We make an early exit and hit the playground. Swing through Sainsbury’s to get formula, tomatoes and a cucumber. £11.60
1pm: Electricians arrive to (hopefully) issue us a compliance certificate so we can stop paying extortionate premium on our home insurance due to not having Building Control sign-off. Power in the house goes down so I make kids a picnic lunch. It goes down like a shit sandwich, which – given the amount of my children’s faeces probably lurking behind my fingernails – it pretty much was.
3.30pm: Off to playground again and then home via Sainsbury’s to buy dinner: fishcakes, spinach, humus, cheese… £11.70
Buy six weeks' supply of nappies for the two kids on Amazon Prime (£49). Feel guilt over carbon footprint and of course using Amazon. Obviously not that much guilt though.
9pm: Have a lovely long, pretty much scalding bath and look at bedside lamps online. Asleep by 11pm.
Total: £75.30
Day Three
6.30am: HALLELUJAH! B has slept through for the third time in her nearly 11-month life. Mark the milestone with an upbeat breakfast (nursery rhymes on loop, allow her to eat bowl of Weetabix with her hands).
9.30am: Get a call from ex-colleague to ask if I am interested in doing some freelance project management work. Provisionally say yes ‘if the finances make sense’ and for maximum three days a week. Feel mix of guilt at putting B into childcare and elation at the prospect of FREEEEDOM.
11am: Take A to a language development class that he has been asked to attend based on his delayed speech. It is run by the local council so completely free. A loves the class and participates really well.
12.30pm: To celebrate both potential income and A’s speech progress we go to a nice café for lunch – sausage sandwich (on sourdough obvs) for A and a Reuben for me. B, now awake, attacks an Ella’s pouch (£14.20 including tip).
1am: Quick whip round Lidl to offset cost of lunch out. Get a load of fruit and veg, sausages, sea bass and kids' snack stuff – £27.80. Pick up bread from local deli, £2.50.
3.30pm: NCT friend comes round with her son – after 10 minutes of aggressive house-trashing we decamp to the playground.
7.30pm: After dropping my work phone down the loo two months ago I have been battling with my husband's VERY faulty phone, which has been SEVERELY limiting my social life. Feeling flush due to aforementioned new work prospects and buy a new one online on a 24-month contract. £38 per month and £7.99 upfront.
10pm: While watching TV I look at prints for the kitchen and buy new light for the bathroom: £24.
Total: £76.49
Day Four
7am: Another full night’s sleep from B. We brave the Arctic conditions to hit up some puddles on the common.
1pm: Swing home via (you guessed it) Sainsbury’s for an eclectic selection of groceries, chosen solely based on whether they slot under the buggy easily. £8.79
3pm: Go round to new friend's and discuss ex-boyfriends while kids mash Play-Doh into her new flooring and paint onto her table (she was marvellously relaxed about this – additional points).
Call from work HR to confirm my resignation (also confirmed that I will get paid for my accrued holiday – RELIEF).
5pm: Crack open wine while developing high fat, high calorie dish for B – sweet potato, cream and grated cheese – all puréed together and mixed with penne pasta and more cheese. Will this carb fest help secure the magic three nights in a row?
9pm: Husband is out so find period drama on Netflix, eat fried halloumi and sink the rest of wine. Buy husband some jeans online (late Christmas present) and a pair of trousers for son in sale. £73.99
Total: £82.78
Day Five
7am: PRAISE THE LORD – B achieved three nights on the trot. Apparently this means she is now in a ‘fixed pattern’, this could be BIG.
10am: Spend the morning doing washing, mopping floor and arranging my books in colour order while B is napping and A at nursery.
12.30pm: New phone delivered. Went for rose gold. Is that awful? So out of touch I’m not sure.
1pm: Friend comes round for lunch. I show her my colour-coded bookshelves. I think she pities me.
3pm: Take kids on an exhilarating outing to buy 16 different spices to make a Jamie Oliver rogan josh. £12.95
4pm: Start making curry while both kids napping (way too late in the day but happy for the peace so I let it happen). Curry is seriously fiddly and I sense it is not going to be worth it.
9pm: Definitely not worth it, curry so hot it is almost inedible. We douse it in a vat of yoghurt while ploughing into the wine and watching Beauty and the Beast(without the kids). Yes, this is our Friday night now.
Total: £12.95
Day Six
3am: Screams from next room as B breaks her run. BASTARD.
2pm: Train to Clapham Junction where husband meets a couple of mates to watch the rugby and I meet a friend for a ‘potter’ around the shops.
2.15pm: Remember I have kids and wandering at will around shops no longer remotely possible. Adopt military approach and purchase B her first pair of shoes, £30. Yes that is the going rate for a pair of ‘cruisers’ – which will no doubt be worn approximately eight times before one of them is kicked off into a pond/train track/dog's mouth, never to be seen again. Also buy very Little House on the Prairie meets Queen Elizabeth I top for her in sale, £10.
3pm: Head to Waitrose to get A to sleep (the soothing hum of the deli aisle). Ten minutes later he’s out for the count and I’ve spent £16.20 on an eclectic selection of items.
3.15pm: Get ESSENTIAL protective cover for new phone. £5
3.30pm: Buy friend late lunch to thank her for helping with kids. £10.75
4.30pm: Head to spacious pub where husband and mates join to watch second rugby match of the afternoon. Get bottle of white, beers for the lads and chips for the kids. Make friends with fellow parents who have also dragged babies to pub. £49
6.30pm: Kids starting to get aggressively feral, encouraged by childless friends to leave.
7pm: Swing by our dear friends in Sainsbury’s* to get beer, pizza, ice cream and other Saturday night essentials. £24.80
NB: This is not sponsored by Sainsbury’s I swear
Total: £145.75
Day Seven
10.30am: Up and out to Regent's Park en route to seeing friends for lunch and more rugby in northwest London. Son collects sticks, throws sticks, throws himself onto sticks.
Enter café to get hot drinks (£6) in pursuit of 20p change with which to frequent the loos. (Had attempted to vault barrier but caught in the act by disapproving Russian granny.)
8pm: Buy couple of toddler books and brass handles on Amazon for chest of drawers which I plan to paint at some point before painting wood goes out of fashion (my prediction = 2020), £19.50. Spend a long time looking at sofas we can’t afford.
Total: £25.70
The Breakdown
Food/Drink: £199.99
Entertainment: £3
Clothes/Beauty: £113.99
Home: £543.50
Other: £62.19
Total: £922.67
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