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So you're going on holiday, and that means it's time to close out of Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, Hinge, and all your other dating apps, right? Not necessarily. While using dating apps on holiday might seem silly, since you'll only be wherever you're traveling for a short time, it can actually be an amazing way to meet new friends. Or, to have some really hot casual sex, if that's what you're into.
Online dating coach Julie Spira has one client who often gets free tickets to concerts through work. So, when she's traveling, she'll update her dating apps to say that she's going to see so-and-so play and has an extra ticket, if anyone wants to claim it. "Every single time she meets an incredible person and has an incredible time," Spira says. They'll go out for coffee or go out for dinner before the show. Sometimes, it turns romantic, but even when it doesn't she meets a new friend.
So don't assume that you need to quit your dating apps while you're away. They might actually be the one thing that makes your time away an adventure. Ahead, Spira and Robyn Exton, co-founder of queer dating app HER, give their tips for making the most of your apps while you're traveling.
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Plan ahead.
On the free versions of most dating apps, you can't change your location without physically being in a different place. But some apps offer premium services, like Tinder Passport, that allow you to change your location before you leave. And if you're really serious about meeting people while you're away, paying for a month of those premium services might be worth it. "You want to be able to get some matches before you get there because otherwise you run out time, you're too busy, you miss connections, and it just doesn't work," Exton says. Investing in a feature that will allow you to swipe on matches beforehand is the one thing that will make the biggest difference when you go on holiday, she says. If you're not into paying for an app that's usually free, you can also check if that feature has a free trial around the time you'll be traveling.
illustrated by Paola Delucca.Clik here to view.
Be clear (with yourself and your matches).
If you're planning to use dating apps on holiday, make sure you know what you want before you get started, Exton says. And make sure your matches know what you want as well.
Are you looking for a casual hookup? Are you traveling alone and just want someone to show you around? Are you on holiday with friends and trying to meet some cool people who can join your group? Or are you running out of options in your hometown and seriously looking for a relationship? "Decide whatever it is and then put it in your bio on your profile," Exton says. "Be really, explicitly clear."
You can type something like, "I'm in town for five days and looking for someone to show me around." Or, "I'm traveling to Boston in two weeks, and looking for a casual hookup. Want to show me a good time?"
illustrated by Paola Delucca.Clik here to view.
Be thoughtful.
If you're travelling somewhere where the culture is much different from your own, recognise and be respectful of that, Exton says. If you're on a queer dating app and traveling internationally, for example, understand that in some countries it's still dangerous to be openly gay. So while you may be very out on social media, the people you're meeting might not be out at all and probably wouldn't want photos that tie them to queer events floating around. If that's not an issue, it's still important to be read up on local culture and customs, whenever you're traveling. That way, you'll avoid offending anyone.
illustrated by Paola Delucca.Clik here to view.
Be safe.
Just like you'd make sure a friend knew that you were out on a date and you'd set up dates in public places when you're home, you'll want to make sure you're following safety tips while dating abroad. That means, don't tell any potential matches where you're staying. "I wouldn't give anyone my home address, so why would I say what hotel I'm staying in?" Spira says. When you're traveling, the rules might feel a little more lax because you're all about having a good time. But safety is still important, Spira says. So make sure someone knows where you are, meet people in public places before going anywhere private, and try not to get too drunk around someone you just met. "And if you're uncomfortable for any reason, then say 'It was really nice meeting you. I'm not sure this is a fit,' and graciously exit," she says.
illustrated by Paola Delucca.Clik here to view.
Have good and safe sex (if you want to).
Exton's most important rule? Have all the hot, adventurous (but still safe and consensual!) sex that you want.
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